


Ways to Recognize a Good Partner

by PattRose



Category: Battle Creek (TV)
Genre: Gen, Humor, Lists
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-01
Updated: 2015-07-01
Packaged: 2018-04-07 03:12:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 3,615
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4247211
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PattRose/pseuds/PattRose
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The boys are discussing ways to recognize a good partner or not.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. They Ignore Past Mistakes

They Ignore Past Mistakes  
By PattRose  
Summary: The boys are discussing ways to recognize a good partner or not. 

 

“You brought me the wrong kind of coffee this morning, Milt.”

“If you were a good partner, you wouldn’t even bring that up. You would ignore my past mistakes.”

“Are you saying I’m not a good partner?” Russ asked, not too seriously. 

Milt smiled and said, “How’s that coffee, Russ?”

“It’s great, Milt, just great.” Russ knew when he was beat. 

Fontanelle just smiled along with everyone else. They all knew that they were good partners, just weird at the same time.


	2. They Don't Compare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They are still discussing good partners.

They Don’t Compare  
By PattRose  
Summary: Still discussing good partners. 

 

“You know one thing I really like about you, Russ?”

“I’m impressed that there is one thing you like.”

“Oh stop it, you know there are a lot of things I like about you,” Milt confessed. 

“So what is the one thing you really like about me?” Russ asked. 

“You don’t compare me to your last partners. You never even bring them up and I know you’ve had some,” Milt pointed out. 

“That’s true, I’m a good partner, I guess.”

“Let’s not push it, Russ.”

“I knew you weren’t as nice as you seemed,” Russ added, smiling like crazy. 

“Really, thanks for being a good partner, Russ.”

“You’re welcome.”

The end


	3. They Understand the Idea of Give and Take

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They might argue over this one.

They Understand the Idea of Give and Take  
By PattRose  
Summary: They might argue over this one. 

 

“Milt, do you think you understand the idea of give and take?”

Milt smiled and said, “Yeah, I give. I take.”

“Do you think that both of us do this?”

Milt thought a moment and answered, “I think that you don’t know the concept of give and take most of the time.”

“What the hell do you mean by that? I give. I take.”

“It’s like pulling teeth out of you sometimes. Just let the goodness flow out of you and stop thinking about it so much.”

“Okay, I understand, and I’m going to take it under advisement,” Russ teased. 

“See, I’m serious and you’re making a joke out of it.”

“I’m serious, seriously, I am.”

“I give up.”

“That’s because you know how to give and take. Good job, Milt.”

The end


	4. They Know the Importance of Time Alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Russ knows this one, but does Milt understand?

They Know the Importance of Time Alone  
By PattRose  
Summary: Russ knows this one, but does Milt understand? 

 

“There is something else that makes a good partner,” Russ said. 

“What’s that, Russ?”

“They know the importance of time alone.”

“Is this in reference to the fact that I brought movies and popcorn over to your place the other night without asking?” Milt asked. 

“Why yes, that’s exactly what I mean,” Russ said. 

“I promise, I won’t do that again without calling first. How did I know that you liked to watch football in your boxers?”

“Most people do, Milt.”

“Really? I don’t know where I’ve been. I learned from this. I’m growing from this. I’ll make a good partner, yet.”

“I think you will too, Milt.”

The end


	5. They Prioritize Communication

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is something that Russ has to work on and he knows it.

They Prioritize Communication  
By PattRose  
Summary: This is something that Russ has to work on and he knows it. 

 

“You know what else makes a good partner, Russ?”

“I’m sure you’re going to tell me, Milt.”

“A good partner prioritizes communication with his partner.”

“You know that sounds like something that they talk about at a shrink’s office.”

“Do you have something you dislike about shrinks?” Milt wondered. 

“Nope, I just wanted to see if you were paying attention. You get a gold star for today.” 

“Russ, don’t you think you could use some improvement on communicating?”

“Well, I do now.”

“Did you think you talked to me easily before?”

“When we first teamed up, I didn’t want to talk to you at all. I think I’ve really grown. I think I deserve a gold star,” Russ said, smiling. 

“You’re right, you are better than when we first started. I guess you’ll just continue to grow.”

“Jesus, Milt, you make me sound like a tomato.”

Milt had to smile at that one and realized that Russ was right. He had grown.

The end.


	6. They Are Straightforward and Uncomplicated

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Russ knows that this one is more Milt than him.

They Are Straightforward and Uncomplicated  
By PattRose  
Summary: Russ knows that this one is more Milt than him. 

 

“Do you think I’m a straight shooter, Milt?”

“Pardon me?”

“Do you know where I stand at all times?” Russ added. 

“Yeah, everyone knows where you stand on things, Russ. The only thing is that you’re a little complicated and that makes it hard to have friends open up to you.”

“We’re talking about partners, Milt. Not friends.”

“Let me reword it. You need a little work in the complicated part of our relationship.”

“I’ll work on it, Milt.”

“Do you think I’m a straight shooter, Russ?”

“Yes… We all know exactly where you stand on everything and you are very much uncomplicated. You win this round, Milt.”

“It’s not a contest, Russ.”

“Five said I get better than you,” Russ laid a five on the desk. 

“You’re on.”

“Complicated my ass, Milt.”

“You have me there, Russ.”

“Where’s my five?”

“I have to get change…”

The end


	7. They are 'Tuned In'

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Milt is tuned in to everyone at all times. Russ, not so much.

They are ‘Tuned In’  
By PattRose  
Summary: Milt is tuned in to everyone at all times. Russ, not so much. 

“Hey Milt, do you ever feel like you might be a little too tuned in on everyone?”

“Russ, I don’t know how you can say that. That’s a sign of a good partner. Being able to tune in to everyone is very important.”

“I guess so. I won’t argue. Today has been a quiet day. My ears could use the rest,” Russ teased. 

“Am I too ‘tuned in’ to you, Russ?”

“Sometimes, yes. It’s good to be ‘tuned in’ but it’s also nice to give everyone their time and space.”

“Got it, Russ. I’ll work on it.”

The end


	8. They are Light Hearted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who do you suppose is the most fun?

They are Light Hearted  
By PattRose  
Summary: Who do you suppose is the most fun? 

 

Milt walked up to Russ’s desk and asked, “Do you think you’re light hearted?”

“I’m a little light headed today, but no, not light hearted.” Russ snickered at his joke. 

“Do you think that I’m any fun to be around?” Milt asked. 

“Milt we laugh about you all the time.”

“I don’t mean, make fun of me, I mean am I any fun to be around?”

“Yes, you have your moments. Sometimes when you bring donuts and give the lecture to us about eating them, we crack up. You can be very fun.” Russ smiled at his partner. 

“But Russ, I’m serious when I say that shit…”

“Oh…Sorry about that.”

“So I guess you’re more light hearted than I am, right?” Milt asked. 

Russ thought a moment and said, “I think we tie in this one. You make me smile almost every day. There is nothing wrong with that, Milt.”

“Thanks, Russ. That was a nice thing to say.”

“Light hearted people do that shit.”

The end


	9. They are Reasonable

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Both men have to shake their heads at this one.

They are Reasonable  
By PattRose  
Summary: Both men have to shake their heads at this one. 

 

Russ was in the car with Milt and asked, “Do you think I’m reasonable? They say it’s a sign of a good partner.”

“Russ, neither of us are reasonable. We may as well face that, right?”

“But wait a minute, Milt-that was a reasonable thing to say. So, that proved that you are reasonable.”

“And you pointing that out to me was very reasonable. By God, we’re both reasonable,” Milt said, laughing the entire time. 

“Well, at least we can laugh about it, Milt.”

“There is that, Russ.”

The end


	10. They are Self-Aware

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Russ pleads the fifth on this one.

They are Self-Aware  
By PattRose  
Summary: Russ pleads the fifth on this one. 

 

Milt was driving along minding his own business for a change when Russ asked, “Milt, do you think I’m self-aware?”

“You make it sound like you’re an android or something,” Milt answered. 

“I sometimes wonder if I am. I’ll say something or do something and look back at it later and wonder what the fuck was I doing?”

“I think that means you are self-aware if you wonder about it later or at the time. I think about things I say all the time. I know my limitations and my problems and try to deal with them without bothering you.”

“What’s bothering you, Milt?”

“I just wanted to see if you were still awake over there.”

“Very funny and we’re both self-aware. Who knew?”

The end


	11. They are Optimistic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well, at least Milt is.

They are Optimistic  
By PattRose  
Summary: Well, at least Milt is. 

 

“Do you think I’m a glass half empty or a glass half full kind of guy?” Milt asked Russ. 

“Definitely a glass half full kind of guy, why do you ask?” Russ wondered. 

“It says in this list that one of the things to make a good partner is being optimistic. I think I am.”

“Yeah, you are Milt. You always see something good in every problem we find. And sometimes your optimism rubs off on me. Which is all new to me. I’m not used to having this outlook at all,” Russ pointed out. 

“I’ve noticed that you are getting more optimistic as we work together more. I guess I’m just a good partner.”

Russ smiled. “Or, I’m just a really fast learner.”

Milt laughed and added, “I still think it has to do with me.”

“Oh you’re just being optimistic.”

The end


	12. They Take Responsibility for Themselves

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For some reason this one bothers, Russ.

They Take Responsibility for Themselves  
By PattRose  
Summary: This one bother’s Russ a little bit. 

 

“I think the next thing on the list reminds me of darker days,” Russ said. 

“What do you mean?” Milt asked. 

Russ looked at him like he had grown a second head. “Milt, you wanted someone to kill you because you had caused his son’s death. That’s taking responsibility too far.”

“I see what you mean. I’m getting better, Russ. Don’t worry about me, okay?”

“How can I not worry about you? You’re my partner.”

“Thanks, Russ. You having my back helps in the healing process all the more.”

“Let’s move on to the next one. I don’t like this one.”

“Russ, I swear I’m better.”

“You almost died because you felt responsible. There is no way I’m getting over that,” Russ said as calmly as he could. 

“Maybe you might need to see someone, Russ. It really does help talking to someone.”

“Let’s just move on…”

The end


	13. They are Not Emotionally Abuse, Manipulative or Controlling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This one might need some work for both of them.

They are Not Emotionally Abuse, Manipulative or Controlling  
By PattRose  
Summary: This one might need work for both of them. 

 

“Russ, do you think I’m emotionally abusive, manipulative or controlling?”

“A little bit, why? Is that one of the things on the list?”

“We’re not supposed to be those things and be a good partner.”

“Hey some of those faults are my strong points,” Russ teased. 

Milt laughed and said, “I know I can be controlling sometimes.”

“Sometimes?” 

“But on the other hand, you are sometimes emotionally abusive. I think that’s how you cope with things sometimes. But sometimes it still hurts, Russ.”

“What? I hurt your feelings?” Russ snapped. 

“See, you’re doing it right now…”

“Okay, I’ll work on it if you work on controlling everything and everyone,” Russ said. 

“Deal. Thanks, Russ.”

“For what?”

“For being willing to work on our problems,” Milt said happily. 

“You’re weird,” Russ stated. 

“And you still need work.”

“Let’s move on, Milt.”

The end


	14. They are Generous with Their Time and or Resources

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Russ recognizes the fact that this has Milt written all over it.

They are Generous with Their Time and or Resources  
By PattRose  
Summary: Russ recognizes the fact that this has Milt written all over it. 

 

Russ was studying the list of things you recognize in a good partner. “Hey Milt, I found one that’s perfect for you.”

“Really? Are you being sarcastic, Russ?”

“No, it’s about being generous with your time and resources. This screams Milt to me.”

“Okay, I even have to agree on this one.”

“Sometimes it bothers everyone that you’re so generous. And sometimes it’s almost like your rubbing those resources into our faces,” Russ admitted. 

“Russ, I never feel like that, ever.”

“I said it felt like that sometimes. I didn’t say you did it.”

“You want me to be less generous?” Milt asked. 

“Maybe you could wait until someone asks you to help sometimes. You’re like this big tall over achiever. We would like someone that isn’t quite as generous. But it’s not a bad fault.”

“I really thought I was helping,” Milt said, sounding butt hurt. 

“See, there you go, now you’re feelings are hurt again and there is no reason. Just stop being so Milt sometimes.”

“Russ, I can’t do that. It’s part of my code now. I do the best job I can and do everything I can to make it work out.”

“Well, I guess on this one, we just have to learn to accept the help. It’s not like we don’t appreciate it.”

“You’re welcome, Russ.”

“Shit…” Russ said walking away to get coffee. 

The end


	15. They are Dependable

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Both of them agree on this one.

They are Dependable  
By PattRose  
Summary: Both men agree on this one. 

 

Russ asked, “Do you think I’m dependable?”

Milt smiled. “Yes, Russ. Is that what’s next? I think we’re both dependable. We know we can rely on the other one to have our back. It’s a good feeling.”

“It is a good feeling. You’re a good partner, Milt.”

“As are you, Russ. Wow, we agree on one, take out an ad in the newspaper.”

“We agreed on some other ones,” Russ reminded him. 

“There is that. I like being dependable. It helps a great deal sometimes.”

“Yes, Milt, it does.”

“Woo Hoo, we are doing well,” Milt called out as they headed for the SUV. 

“You’re still weird,” Russ called out as he got into the car. 

“But, I’m weird and dependable. Can’t beat that.”

The end


	16. They are Supportive

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There is arguing, who would have thunk?

They are Supportive  
By PattRose  
Summary: There is arguing, who would have thunk? 

 

Milt sat near Russ’s desk and said, “Okay, the next one is covered by me.”

Russ looked at the list and said, “You think you’re the only one that’s supportive?

“Russ, you’re not really into the helping your partner out kind of feelings.”

“That is so not true, Milt. Have I not supported you through all of the sessions you’re going to at the shrink?”

“Yes, and now everyone else knows about it, thanks a lot, Russ.”

“I didn’t know it was a secret.”

“Well, it’s really no one’s business.”

“Are we fighting, here? You know Milt, this is just some dumb list. We don’t even have to discuss it. But I was trying to be supportive,” Russ added. 

“You’re right, Russ. You are supportive and I was being a dick. Sorry about that.”

“A dick? I don’t think I’ve ever heard you say that before.”

“I’m trying to be one of the guys, here.”

Russ started laughing and said, “You are one of the guys, Milt.”

“Thanks, Russ.”

The end


	17. They Put Consistent Effort into the Relationship

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They both feel like they're doing this.

They Put Consistent Effort into the Relationship  
By PattRose  
Summary: They feel like they are putting effort in. 

 

“Now this next one, I know I have covered. I always put consistent effort into our relationship.”

“Good God, you make it sound like we’re a couple,” Russ joked. 

“Well Russ, in a way we are. Partners are closer than lovers most of the time. I tell you things I would never tell someone I was dating.”

“And I don’t tell you anything…” Russ started laughing as soon as Milt gave him the dirty look. 

“So you’re saying you don’t put any effort into our relationship at all?” Milt wondered. 

“You know I was kidding. I tell you all sorts of things. And I try like hell every day not to kill you,” Russ was still joking. 

“You never take anything seriously, Russ.”

“I put in effort. I truly do. Sometimes it takes an effort just to come to work in the morning but then I remember who I’m working with and get up and almost run to work every day.”

Milt glared at Russ. “There is no need for your sarcasm.”

“It’s part of the way I put in an effort. I try to make you smile, or glare, or frown, whatever. I do it all for you,” Russ confessed. 

“You’re so full of shit…” Milt threw back his head and laughed. 

“This is what I mean, Milt. I make you feel better. That takes effort.”

“I never looked at it like that, Russ. I guess you do put effort into the relationship, but it might not be the right type of effort.”

“Am I a good partner or not, Milt?”

“Yeah, you’re a good partner.”

“I rest my case.”

The end


	18. They are Honest and Trustworthy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Both men finally agree on something.

They are Honest and Trustworthy  
By PattRose  
Summary: Both men finally agree on something. 

 

Milt asked, “Do you think I’m honest and trustworthy?”

“At first, no. You had too many secrets. But now, yes I believe you are,” Russ answered. 

“I feel the same way about you, Russ. You were a work in progress.”

“Oh please, Milt who had the secrets? Me or you?”

“You got me on that one. But since then, I have been an open book,” Milt replied. 

Russ burst out laughing. “Milt, you’re never going to be an open book. You work for the FBI for God’s sake. Secrets R Us. And that’s all right because you’re always upfront with me and as honest as you can be.”

“Being an agent makes it a little harder to deal with everyday life, Russ. I’m glad you understand, though.”

“On the cases we work on, I think we’re completely trustworthy. Except for one thing. How in the hell do you get Meredith to like you so much?”

Milt laughed really hard. “She can be a bit of a pain, but she means well.”

“Milt she means to jump your bones.”

“You can stop being truthful any time now, Russ.”

“Just saying…”

“To get back on track, we do trust each other, right?” Milt asked. 

“Yes, Milt, I trust you. I trust you to tell me what the deal with Meredith is?”

Milt snickered. “Honestly, I don’t know. I’ve never had anyone so into me in my life.”

“Just ask her out and be yourself,” Russ said, laughing. 

“Are you making fun of her because she’s a little person?” Milt looked horrified. 

“Never. I’m making fun of you. Not her.”

“Getting back on track we’re both honest and trustworthy, right?”

“Right…” Russ smiled all the way out the door. 

The end


	19. They are Able to Say 'Sorry'

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Both of the men frown on this one.

They are Able to Say ‘Sorry’  
By PattRose  
Summary: Both of the men frown on this one. 

 

“Milt do you find it easy saying sorry?”

“Oh hell no. I find this one of the hardest things to do.”

“But let’s say you got me a sandwich but you got me the wrong kind. When you handed it to me, would you say, ‘sorry I got the wrong one’, or would you just hand it to me?” Russ asked. 

“On that I would tell you I was sorry I got the wrong one. And you tell me sorry often, do you not remember when you say you’re sorry?” 

“Milt, I try to wipe that from my mind as soon as it’s out of my mouth.”

Milt laughed and said, “I think it’s human nature to not like to say ‘sorry’. 

“We did really well on the other ones so far, don’t you think?”

“Yeah, this one doesn’t really work, I think.” Milt started looking at the next thing on the list. 

“I agree. Onward and upward.”

The end


	20. They are Your Best Friend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Milt needs to find out if this is true.

They are Your Best Friend  
By PattRose  
Summary: Milt needs to find out if this is true. 

 

“Why are you so quiet today? We only have one thing on the list left. What is it?” Russ asked. 

“I’m quiet because I’m thinking. Everyone should think at least once a day, you know?”

Russ laughed and said, “Okay, tell me what’s bothering you.”

“I don’t have many friends,” Milt admitted. 

“So…I don’t have many friends either.”

“Yes, you do. You go out with Font all the time for beer.”

“When his wife allows it. He’s a good friend, yes. But you have friends.”

“Who, Russ? Tell me who my friends are?”

“Okay, first of all, I’m your friend. We’re good friends.” Russ couldn’t believe that Milt didn’t think he had any friends. 

“Okay, so I have you-do I have any other friends?” Milt asked. 

“You have Meredith. She would count for like ten people, I think.”

Milt didn’t laugh so Russ knew this was serious. “What is the last thing that makes a good partner?”

“It says, they are your best friend,” Milt answered miserably. 

“Do you have a problem with that, Milt? I consider you my best friend. We share everything, even if we don’t want to. I don’t share all that with anyone else. Am I not your best friend?”

Milt beamed with happiness and joy. “Are you serious?”

“What? You didn’t know we were best friends?” Russ asked. 

“Russ, usually you can’t even tolerate me.”

“But Milt, that’s how I am and you know it. You’re my best friend, so stop worrying about it. Do you want to go to the pub tonight and have a drink and throw some darts?”

Milt lit up like a light bulb. “I would love to go to the pub and have a drink and play darts. Have I ever told you how much I love playing darts?”

Russ laughed and asked, “Have I ever told you how much I hate to lose at darts?”  
Milt said, “Understood, Russ. I’ve got to get some work done before we leave.”

“Hey Milt, would you like me to invite Meredith?”

Milt leaned into Russ and whispered, “I would have to bury your body.”

Russ liked that answer, laughed and got back to work. 

Yes, this is how it worked with best friends. 

The end


End file.
